Are you tired from too much work and not enough “me time”? Do you feel obligated to check emails after hours or on weekends? Are your “days off” filled with errands and laundry?

If you said yes to these, you’re not alone. Studies show Americans are exhausted and work 400 more hours annually than people in all developing nations. Why is this? Some blame economic fears—yet experts clarify “workaholism” exists in any environment. Economists surmise work cultures that champion “always on” productivity models are at the root of Americans’ work ethos.

Whatever the reason, if we never unplug we will eventually break down. And that’s what mental health providers see firsthand. When we are out of balance—meaning we work more and neglect relationships, health and personal needs—our bodies echo the strain. This dynamic spurs sleep disruption, sedentary lifestyles and on-the-go meals. It may contribute to increasing rates of anxiety, depression, addiction, suicide, diabetes and heart disease.

“Typically, when someone comes to me for help, something significant has happened to reveal their underlying issue of living a life that is out of balance,” says Moe Gelbart, PhD, director of behavioral health at Torrance Memorial Medical Center.

“New (counseling) patients often have health issues, like a back that’s out or a heart condition, minor stroke or high blood pressure. Sometimes they have significant weight gain from not taking time for self-care. Others don’t realize they are out of balance until their relationships fall apart. These concerns, however, are not the root of their problems; there are bigger issues at hand.”

Learning how to prioritize health, personal goals and family time can be tricky. Establishing—and sticking to—boundaries is not easy, especially if work habits have cemented into an addiction.

“Workaholism is indeed something real,” warns Dr. Gelbart. “And like most addictions, it can be identified when negative consequences arise out of the behavior, yet the behavior continues.”

Don’t know if you’re a workaholic? Dr. Gelbart says a workaholic who seeks counseling after a crisis—like back surgery or a spouse demanding a divorce—will often rebound into chronic work habits once their back pain dissipates or their spouse decides to stay. If this resonates with you, seek help from a mental health professional.

It is possible to balance your work and life by prioritizing needs, relationships and health. These questions will help you gain clarity:

• What do you want more time for? Family? Athletics? Social activities? Creative outlets? Volunteering? Church? Travel?
• Do you feel the effects of mental exhaustion? These include a short temper; poor attention and focus; sleep problems; anxiety; or feelings of lack of purpose, love, recognition, connection or hope.
• Do you have a health issue? Such as weight gain, low energy, headaches, chronic body aches, tummy aches, neck/shoulder stiffness or frequent colds?

When we listen to what our bodies tell us, we can make mindful adjustments. If you experience any symptoms listed above, set an intention to address the issue(s). A mental health counselor or life coach can help. And remember to be proud of yourself. Change is never easy. But when you value yourself, your needs and your time, others will eventually respect your choices.  

Need ideas to lower stress and relax? Try one or more of these suggestions:

• Try meditation. (New? Download an app like Chopra or Headspace.)
• Take a nature walk.
• Watch less TV news.
• Listen to music or an uplifting podcast while you cook a healthy dinner.
• Take a bath.
• Lower lighting in the evenings and light a candle.
• Garden (pots in a window count!).
• Try a beginning yoga class.
• Read a good book and/or join a book club.
• Write in a daily gratitude journal.
• Watch a favorite feel-good or funny movie.
• Have a no-phones-at-the-table rule.
• Practice giving your partner, friends, colleagues, children your full attention.